On Confidence and Trusting Yourself

I got a career do-over recently. It’s not what I did but how I did it that matters.

That Time I Failed
Years ago, I facilitated a workshop that was a stretch for me. I thought I had it.  It was a challenge, but everything I do in business is designed to put me slightly outside of my comfort zone.  It’s where I’m happiest and where I learn the most.  It’s also how I deliver such high value to clients.

So, I didn’t see it coming when my client interrupted the meeting and took over.  I didn’t stop him.  I hadn’t yet learned how to use my voice and to step into my power to prevent this from happening.

You know those nasty career moments that leave a mark? When something happened that you didn’t expect? That didn’t represent or honor what you knew you could do and were about?  It was one of those moments.

How I Got It Right
Recently, I accepted a similar workshop assignment for a new client.

I got a pit in my stomach early on. The client wasn’t providing the information I needed to customize my workshop approach. They didn’t have time to give me the information I needed to prep properly.

But I pushed forward.

This time, after the workshop was over, the management team came up to tell me how valuable it was. I smiled. I’d done it. I’d put myself in a similarly risky situation, but this time I nailed it. 

Here’s how I did it:

1) I sat in the client’s ambiguity and directed them enough to get the minimum of what I needed to succeed. In the past I would have pushed for the maximum. 

2) I trusted myself to anticipate the client’s needs in real time. I didn’t set an agenda for the meeting—instead staying loose and adjusting on the fly.

3) I let go of my need to prepare and deliver in a linear, pre-determined way. I conformed to their culture and worked within it.

Comfortable with Discomfort
It takes courage and confidence to act in the face of ambiguity. To lead others, even when you feel uncertain. To move forward, knowing that what you bring to the table is valuable and will be enough.

Years ago, I would have let my need for perfection get in the way of that. Today, I have enough experience to make game time decsions and adjust my approach. I’m willing to flex and figure it out.

You can still have high standards and high expectations. You can still put in the time to prepare. But you have to be willing to speak up, share what you know and point the way – even when things are fuzzy and grey.

Do you have team members who need to find their voice?

Schedule a confidence and presence workshop and help them get a little more comfortable with the messy unknowns.